Marriage comes with lovely benefits, but no
marriage is without problems and difficulties. When people get married, it’s
certain to have problems because of the differences in their life experience.
However, it depends on how you deal with these problems, they can either push
you apart or strengthen your marriage. But all hope is not lost because every
marriage problem has a solution!
Here, are the top marriage problems and solutions
you need to know:
Communication
When discussing the issue of top marriage problems
and solutions, poor communication is considered the first causes of problems in
a marriage. This means not spending enough time to listen and to understand
your spouse. Problems seem to arise in your marriage mainly when you want your
partner to hear and understand your point of view at all times instead of you
hearing and understanding your partner.
The solution to the problem of poor communication
is actually making a date with your spouse to intentionally converse. If you
have children, take them to bed, for a sincere talk with your spouse. Always
give your partner the chance to speak their mind without interrupting, avoid
negative phrases like “you don’t…” or “you never” … when having this
conversation and always show that you're are listening when you speak. Don’t be
distracted, if your spouse is always at home, don’t predict his or her day was
good, ask about your partner’s day. You’ll notice that your partner has a lot
of things they want to talk about while you were away. Also, take some time out
for dinner or the movies to rekindle the dying fire in your marriage.
Money
Money is a very important point when discussing the
top marriage problems and solutions. We see that couple regularly fights about
money, most times not just about money but struggles for power or any other
issues that surround money. However, money problems can lead to general
marriage stress, anxiety, and more problems.
The solution to this is to plan out your finances,
do this by creating a financial plan. Set your goals as a couple, your goals
could be to buy a car, college expenses for the children etc. Open a joint bank
account for the family, leave 90 percent of your money there and 10 percent in
your individual account, this will be for your personal expenses and can freely
spend.
Sex And Intimacy
Sex brings intimacy in marriage, it releases the
hormones that help your bodies feel happy physically and mentally. Sex can be
considered very important when explaining the issue of top marriage problems
and solutions. Sexual disappointments and unfulfilled expectations could lead
to a loss of trust and intimacy in marriage. For example; 3 months after a good
honeymoon, you may begin to realize that your sexual experience with your
partner is not as you had imagined. This can lead to frequent advances that
could become annoying, unfruitful and perceived as rejection.
If sex has become a problem in your marriage, the
solution to this is to set out a plan, fix it on a time table, it will increase
your anticipation. However, doing things differently can help your sex life to
be more fun, like making love out of your bed, in the kitchen etc. Also, learn
how to get your partner on, it sparks lovemaking.
Infidelity
Top marriage problems and solutions can't be
successfully discussed without tackling this. Infidelity is a killer of trust
and commitment in marriage. If your partner isn't satisfied with the marriage,
it simply means you are not giving all you could. When you aren’t open with
your partner about what you feel, that may also result in distrust and reduce
commitment.
To solve the infidelity problem in your marriage,
you should be ready to do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust lost. It’s
important to always be sincere, honest, act with integrity and let your actions
match our words. Having a partner who feels comfortable to open up to you, is
best the best attitude for building trust and solving infidelity problems.
Addictive Habits
Addictive lifestyles or habits are also one of the
top problems marriages face, this can destroy the foundation of your marriage.
It becomes a problem if your spouse begins to feel they can’t depend on you for
something because you are too busy with addictive activities, like social
media, alcohol, drugs, shopping or gambling.
This problem will be solved if the couple can
notice their habits and start fixing them. Take some time to honestly share
with each other about how unsatisfied you feel about each other's habits.
However, bad addictions are not easy to be changed, but when you have a good
intention to change, they will gradually fade out. It's not enough to spot out
bad habits, a couple should support each other to handle these addictions, and
patiently watch the positive changes occur. Remember that you can’t control
your spouse’s behaviours. What you can always control is yours.
Careers
Couple having the desire to pursue their career is
a very good thing but it is also one of the top problems in a marriage. Most
couples feel feeding their family is all that matters, so they go ahead to pick
the corporate careers at the expense of their marriages. Also, some couples
move far from their families for the purpose of careers but this always leads
to broken marriages.
Balance is necessary if you value your marriage.
Careers should be pursued but not when is at the expense of your marriage.
Either the job is turned down or one couple relocates to suit the new job.
Religion
This another serious issue, if not handled, can
affect marriage negatively. Some people forget to settle religious issues
before marriage. It’s always not a problem until the couples begin to have
children. One of the spouses may desire to raise their children with the same
religious believes he/she was raised and this usually will bring a lot of
problems to the marriage. This is a serious problem because people take
religious issues so serious to compromise.
This kind of problems should be settled before
marriage. Although while in marriage, the solution to this problem is that one
partner changes their religion for the other in order to maintain peace and
harmony.
Distance
Marriage problems could result from too much
distance, very busy schedules for several reasons. You both can be too busy
with work, kids and your own personal interests that you could last for days
without having time together. When you allow distance to become a problem in
your marriage, you get at risk of being too casual and losing interest in each
other.
Solve this problem, by taking steps to limit the
distractions and use some of your time to reconnect with your spouse. You could
still attend to your children and work, yet share some moments with your
partner. Also, if you spend so much time watching the television, simply put it
off for at least 30 minutes and have some time talking with your spouse.
In-laws
In-laws are a part of every marriage but if you
drag them into your personal affair, your marriage will begin to experience
some problems. The reason why you leave your family to get married is to build
your own.
To solve marriage problems associated with in-laws,
you need to learn to put each other first before your extended families. To
keep your marriage healthy, you must set firm boundaries with in-laws, this
will bring respect to your marriage and your in-laws as well.
Friends
As much as friends can improve your life and
marriage, some friends are harmful to your marriage as well, they lie, insult
and betray you. Some are overly needy, and some give too much advice that could
cause problems for your marriage.
When Friends begin to cause challenges to your
marriage, the solution to issues is to deliberately leave such bad friends by
the wayside to save your marriage. Also, it would be wise to know who you are
meeting and how you tell them about your partner.
Children
Children are good and can bring wonderful gifts to
your lives. However, having children lead to increased stress in your marriage.
Most women don’t feel satisfied with their marriage after having children
because taking care of your children could reduce the time you spend with your
spouse.
To solve this problem, you should accept children
as part of your marriage, you and your partner should share the responsibility
of taking care of the children.
Home Chores
Home chores could be so overwhelming. Women always
feel unsupported when their husbands don’t help with the laundry, dusting, and
dish washing etc.
The solution to this issue is to stay organized and
clear about duties in your home. List down all the home chores and discuss how
to handle them and it’s important to share the chores. However, if you both
don’t like home chores, maybe you could hire a cleaning service.
Now you know the top marriage problems and
solutions. I will conclude by saying, marriage is actually a beautiful thing
and differences shouldn't be the reason for problems. Rather, these differences
should be used to help each for a blissful marriage.
No comments:
Post a Comment